OK, so you want a taste of my life? Here’s my partner’s blog today:
…We have done 15 trillion activities but nothing for more than 5 minutes at a time. Let me tell you – that’s a LOT of cleaning up and putting away.
I’m frustrated. I’m tired. I’m lonely (which is odd since I don’t have 10 seconds to myself). I’m tired of hearing “MAMA!” screamed at me. I’m tired of hearing “I want a snack!” “MAAAAAMAAAAAA….you HAVE to!” “MAAAMAAAAAA….Come HERE!”
I’m tired of saying “Come here if you want to speak with me.” “You just ate breakfast/lunch. You can have a snack in a couple hours.” “Actually, I don’t HAVE to do anything. I’m the parent.”
And I’m so over the whining today. The fussing. The tears.
Have I mentioned lately that I haven’t had a child-free moment to myself in weeks and weeks? Good thing nap time is coming.
What am I to do with this? Being a typical “man” (yes, I am a woman, but have been told that I often behave in a relationship as a man would), I want to solve this problem. Being a woman, I get to feel really guilty about it. I did “get us into this.” In reality, there is nothing I can do. I am already more behind in class than I’d like. By that, I only mean that I am keeping up with the reading, but had no time for extras, and have not looked at the draft of my paper that needs lots of polish before Tuesday. I do not have time to come home and do chores, fix things, clean things, give my partner a break. I’d love to give her a break, but the reality is, if I do not devote tomorrow to school work, I will fall painfully behind. Sunday? Yes, on Sunday I can relieve her for a couple hours.
I know my partner balances her love of our children and her good fortune at being able to stay home with them with the need for a break and some time to herself.
I balance my desire/need for a law education with my responsibilities to my family now. Neither is a particularly enviable position. I did expect evening student challenges, especially considering my daytime job, and having two small children. Reality is setting in.